Overestimation vs. Empathy

Fifty years ago, I took my bride-to-be to the top of Chesery, a rugged peak overlooking the back valley of my hometown near the Swiss border. We were young and soon to be married, and I assumed—naively—that she could handle the climb without issue, even though she’d never done any mountain hiking before.

The ascent was no small feat: 2,460 feet of vertical gain (750 meters), and my girlfriend, bless her, endured the full uphill grind and descent, earning a pair of blisters and a fair bit of frustration along the way. Looking back, I realize that moment was emblematic of a broader blind spot in my youth: the inability to truly place myself in someone else’s shoes. 

As a ski instructor, I often let my passion for the sport override my students’ comfort and skill levels, nudging them into runs that were clearly beyond their capabilities. It took time—and a few hard lessons—for me to learn that empathy isn’t just about kindness; it’s about restraint, about listening, about seeing the world through someone else’s eyes. 

Call it the exuberance of youth, or the slow education of experience. Either way, I’m grateful for the people who endured my early missteps and helped me grow into someone more attuned to others’ limits and needs.