Getting rid of grudge (Part two)

Erasing resentment from our crowded minds generally works pretty well because several mechanisms seem to be involved. The first is that we finally stop fighting reality. Typically, a painful event occurred. It shouldn’t have, but it did. 

Our mind often spends years arguing with a fact that cannot be changed. Letting go means acknowledging reality without having to approve of it and this frees enormous mental energy. 

Next, it’s easy to see that as long as our emotional state depends on someone else's apology, punishment, or transformation, part of our well-being remains in their hands. By releasing resentment, we reclaim ownership of our inner life. 

That’s precisely when the message becomes: "What happened was wrong, but I refuse to let it poison my present." At this point, our stress physiology settles down as anger, and grievance activate threat-related systems in the body. The result of repeatedly replaying injuries can maintain elevated stress responses, muscle tension, vigilance, and emotional reactivity. 

When the grievance loses its emotional grip, the body often relaxes as well. At that moment, attention becomes available again. We all know that attention is a limited resource that will finally be able to return to us as extra energy. 

This additional source of energy can be redirected toward our relationships, creativity, helping others, learning, spiritual endeavors and just enjoying life. In essence, forgiveness is not giving something to the offender but it’s recovering something for us! 

Tomorrow we’ll see what kind of benefits will come to us…

Getting rid of grudge (Part one)

 

If there is an operation that costs next to nothing and can relieve us from a heavy and continuous burden, it has to be the simple fact of extinguishing grudge, bitterness, hostility, desire for revenge, rancor, enmity and ill-will, to name just a few. These emotions often function like a form of psychological debt. 

They require energy to maintain. The mind repeatedly revisits old injuries, reconstructs conversations, imagines alternative outcomes, or rehearses punishments for those who have wronged us. Even when we are not consciously thinking about the offense, part of our emotional system often remains mobilized around it. 

Of course, I’m not suggesting excusing wrongdoing, forgetting what happened, reconciling with an unsafe person, or abandoning justice. It is primarily an internal act: refusing to continue carrying the emotional burden. Resentment feels heavy to us because when we’re hurt, our minds often conclude: 

"This should not have happened." 

"Someone owes me." 

"Things would be better if they suffered as I suffered." 

"I cannot be at peace until this is corrected." 

And it’s precisely these thoughts that can keep us psychologically attached to the injury and our attention to the past, the event may be over, but your emotional system continues to invest resources in it. When we can’t remove ourselves from these experiences, it always requires more time, maturity and a more intense understanding before we discover that the person we’re punishing most effectively is just ourselves. 

Next time, we’ll attempt to understand how this mental liberation actually operates, so please stay with me!

Pierrot Vernay, 1947-2026

Pierrot passed away on June 23 at age 78. We grew up together as we went to the same grade school, but I didn’t know much about him. I for sure never played with him. His parents were Julien and Olga and he was the elder of three kids in our village baker’s household. 

I’m not writing this because we literally grew up at the same time, but because our childhood happened in two very different silos. He didn’t seem to be a great student and one day his parents must have told him “You’ll be a baker like your Dad, and one day you’ll take over the family business…” without asking what he liked and what he wanted to be. Either fireman, carpenter, airplane pilot or dentist. 

Nope, I can comfortably assume that the question was never asked and he was given no other option. True, none of my parents either asked me that question. What would have Pierrot done if he had the option to pursue his true aspirations? No one will know, but still, he was put to hard work at 14, he spent his life making bread, baking it and feeding us and the growing number of visiting tourists. 

Over the years, I’ve seen him many times waiting on customers behind his counter when his wife Henriette or his mum weren’t available. For lack of a good reason we had not interaction other than “Hello, thank you, goodbye”. 

At retirement, he was totally exhausted, he closed down his bakery and continued living in the same building and complemented his retirement and savings by selling firewood he had prepared for our visitors. 

Did he die happy, fulfilled and having accomplished everything he ever dreamed of? I don’t know and will never have the answer to that question. Adieu, Pierrot!

Let’s take a break!

Sometimes, I fell like literally “running out of gas” and I wonder what are the virtues and the benefits of just "taking a break" from the daily routine? 

Taking a break might end the cycle of chronic stress, reset our brain's processing power, and prevents psychological burnout. It could also shifts our nervous system out of a constant "fight-or-flight" state and place it into a restorative phase. It’s pretty obvious that constant attention drains our working memory. A brief freeze in our routine should recharges our ability to concentrate more deeply. 

Scientists say that stepping away activates the brain's "default mode network." This is the subconscious state where our mind connects unrelated ideas and solves complex problems, like sleep does to a certain degree. It’s also easy to understand that relentless daily choices degrade the quality of our judgment. Pausing also preserves our willpower, mental stamina as well as enhances our sinking memory (we could all use some of this, these days!). 

Some also claim that our brain requires downtime to process, categorize, and store new information learned during our busy routine, and this sounds perfectly logical. Since we all love talking about our hormones, stepping away is also supposed to drop stress hormones like cortisol. This directly can reduce physical tension, lower blood pressure, and boost our immune functions. I’ve also read that taking a big break can rebuild our emotional resilience by reducing both irritability and anxiety. 

With this we get more emotional space to respond to challenges rather than just react. Wow! Not only this, but it should improve our sleep quality as it detaches us from daily stressors and quiets our our mind from racing at night, leading to deeper sleep cycles. I like it! Pausing the noise of a routine is also said to allow us to check in with our deep feelings, goals, and physical health needs. 

Finally, if our timetable won’t let us take a huge, big break, there’s always the “micro-breaks” that can work small miracles in our physical environment. For instance, just move to a different room or step outside. I’m not saying light up a Marlboro! 

A visual shift signals to our brain that work has paused. Let’s make sure to leave our phone in another room so we don’t have the temptation to scroll, which, as we all know, depletes us totally of mental energy. Non-cognitive tasks like spending 10 minutes doing something that requires zero deep thought, like stretching, walking, or staring out a window. 

I kind of like these micro-breaks and short of taking that week long retreat I know I’ll never get to, I’ll begin there by incorporating them in my daily routine! 

Sharpening our scissors!

To segue in the cutting department, I’ve been wanting for a very long time to learn how to sharpen the disabled scissors that have become useless all over my house. 

This past weekend, I finally broke the spell of inaction, rolled up my sleeves, looked for ideas, found out what was needed, did the job, tested it and I now enjoy a stable of rejuvenated scissors that are hungry to sink their blades into all kinds of materials. 

There are quick and simple ways to sharpen dull household scissors using household items like using a knife sharpening rod, a thin grit file, diamond or stone files. Sure, for a lasting, professional edge, the best is to sometimes (not always) disassemble the scissors and use a sharpening stone or dedicated file to gently hone the beveled edges. A quicker way to restore scissors often begins by cleaning them. 

Wipe down their blades with rubbing alcohol to remove the sticky residue that settles around them. Then, find the bevel and identify its angle or slope, on the outside of each blade. 

Sharpen by placing the blade flat against the knife sharpening rod, a thin grit file or a sharpening stone, making sure the tool is angled to match the bevel. Use a consistent motion to stroke the blade across the stone from base to tip (away from the edge) repeated times. 

Deburr by feeling the back of the blade for a slight "burr", using a thin file, close and open the scissors a few times, or scrape a fine file or ceramic rod gently to remove any remaining burr. 

Better yet, watch the video to open your eyes to that deceptively simple repair. That’s it, you will have discovered that you won’t have to buy new scissors again! 

Gérard Brémond, 1937-2026

Born in the Paris suburb of Boulogne-Billancourt on 22 September 1937,Brémond met the 1960 Olympic champion Jean Vuarnet † in the early60s and with him developed the Avoriaz ski resort near Montriond, my home town.

This new ski spot wasn’t easy to conceive and develop given its extremely rugged setting and terrain. In fact, Avoriaz came to be asa perfect confluence that happened from a resort concept without automobiles, just like Zermatt (Vuarnet’s idea) and the integration of the architecture that would seamlessly hug the cliffs and the natural surroundings (Bremond’s vision). 

He didn't follow the easy path of developing resorts along the line of  Les Arcs, La Plagne, Flaine or Le Corbier that were totally unimaginative and, let’s admit it, woefully cheap looking and ugly. 

Instead, Brémond seeked a creative architectural team headed by Jacques Labro, Jean-Jacques Orzoni, and Jean-Marc Roques that made the site unique in its field, and probably ended up costing much more than planned, given its complexity when it opened up in 1967. 

Eventually, it evolved into simpler, easier to build buildings as it expanded. In 1973, Brémond introduced the "Pierre & Vacances" vacation lodging concept that went on to achieve remarkable success, barely slowed by the 2020 COVID pandemic. 

Although I never had any personal contact with Gérard Brémond, his pivotal role in the creation of Avoriaz had a positive influence on my young years and played a significant role in launching my professional career. He also leaves behind a legacy of construction projects that innovated the leisure and tourism industry, while remaining closely integrated with their natural surroundings.

A tough, white beard (Part two)

 

Beyond natural wear, several hidden factors cause blades to give out too soon. Leaving your razor in a damp shower causes microscopic rust (oxidation) that eats away at the blade's edge before you use it again. 

In addition a little patience helps: Shaving dry or without adequately softening the hair creates intense physical resistance, which causes the ultra-thin steel to bend and chip rather than slice cleanly. If, like I do, you live in an area with hard water, mineral deposits can leave microscopic debris on the blade's edge, increasing friction and dulling its power. 

Then it’s crucial to rinse out hair, shaving cream, and dead skin cells after each pass, as these corrosive elements get trapped against the metal, accelerating breakdown. Good intentions often lead us pressing the shaver down too hard on the skin and force the blade's sharp edge to violently scrape the skin rather than glide across the surface, which causes the edge to micro-chip. Finally, I’ve found this advice on Reddit helpful and I might try to follow it. 

Clearly, water is the enemy. Finicky people will use a hairdryer on high for 10-15 seconds to evaporate micro-drops from the blade. Some men dip their razor head in a small container of Athena Club rubbing alcohol or mineral oil between shaves to prevent moisture corrosion. Plenty of water will soften your hair following a shower. A high-quality pre-shave oil will reduce hair stiffness, giving the blade an easier job. I am using shaving cream, but how it interacts with the blade depends heavily on its ingredients and how it’s rinsed. 

Blades can easily get clogged with heavy oils, silicones, and thick emollients that form a stubborn film that’s difficult to rinse off. Some aerosol gels and creams also contain propellants or high alcohol content that will accelerate the degradation of the blade. Too thick a lather can trap water against the cutting edge even after a quick rinse, leading to microscopic rust, so it's always a good idea to rinse the razor frequently under hot, running water during your shave to liquefy and dislodge soap residue. 

Don’t forget the backside and direct the water stream there as well to push out trapped cream and hair. Finally don’t just wipe the blade edge with a towel or finger to remove cream, as this can bend and dull the microscopic edge, instead dunk the blade head in rubbing alcohol after your final rinse to completely dissolve remaining soap films and displace water. 

If you apply all these tips, you’re a Saint, and have just wasted twice as much of your precious time shaving instead of doing fun things!