Free ski lesson on a chairlift

Last week, I was loading a chairlift next to an older guy about my age. He or his buddies brought the safety bar down, which I never do (it’s not a Park City tradition) and on that 6 passenger high-speed lift there was no footrest.

So I let my feet dangle a bit is some kind of a swinging motion without touching anyone else’s skis. Seeing this, the old guy grumbled (His tone and demeanor were dead serious, not joking at all): “Don’t you touch my skis, I just tuned them; I’m a ski tuner!” 

I answered: “That’s not at all my intent. Where do you tune skis?” He responded: “At the Deer Valley ski rental department, but I’m also a ski instructor and a ski patrol here at Park City!” I was thinking, “Jack of all trades and master of none!” but I didn’t utter a would. 

Unrelentless, he continued: “When I teach skiing I tell my student all the good manners, including not wiggling their skis while riding the chair…” Tired of hearing that old fart, I said: “I’m too old to be lectured, will you stop?” 

Stubbornly, and desperately wanting to have the last word, the old man muttered: “I guess we won’t ride the chairlift together again?” But I finally got to have the last word when I quipped: “You’re damned right!”