There’s this acquaintance of mine that keeps on sending me, year after year, an impressive account of his year past, that is a mixture of photos and text displaying all the stuff he and his direct family achieved over the 12 month period, including big events, exotic or expensive trips, sport participation and the like, showing an almost regal lifestyle that's in my view can only trigger more envy, jealousy than admiration.
It’s easy to see the whole social psychology ecosystem behind those glossy, hyper‑curated year‑end updates, that work less like true sharing, but much more like pure boasting.
They’re crafted narratives designed to communicate a mixture of status (“Look how good we’re doing”), competence (“We’re cool, organized, successful”), being part of a certain class (“We travel everywhere, we do this and that, we live that way”) and control (“Our life is well organized and impressive”).
The display isn’t inherently malicious, but it is curated. And curation always has an audience in mind. Like for most people, my reaction to perfection isn’t warmth, but skepticism and distance. I have a harder time relating to the sender’s story, his excessive self‑promotion activates my comparison instincts and makes anyone feel “less than”, with unspoken competition creeping in, even if no one admits it.
We tend to connect through shared struggle, but not flawless triumphs. All this says in fact a lot about the sender, like insecurity dressed up as achievement as folks that feel deeply secure rarely need to produce a glossy annual report of their life. After scanning the whole document, I rolled my eyes and sent him this response:
“Thanks for sharing your year with us! What an impressive 12 months… I'm sure reading all this makes a lot of folks envious, if not downright jealous! Our message, below, had some great moments too that we didn't list, but also some challenges that taught us a lot. We’ve been trying to focus more on the honest parts of life — the messy, funny, unexpected stuff — because that’s what makes us feel close to everyone. Have a great new year!”








