What are our values? (Part Three)

When values become behaviors, they become unforgettable, and with that in mind, it’s time to see how we can make our values unforgettable. To help, let’s select our values (5 maximum), write them on just one single card, with clear definitions and for each, one specific behavior. 

Keep it short, and remember that if it doesn’t fit on a card, it won’t fit inside our mind. Then we need to rehearse them weekly, not as a moral exercise, but as a calibration. For instance, ask: 

• “Where did I live these values this week?” 
• “Where did I betray them?” 
• “What did I learn?” 

Values become stable through repetition. At that point of mastery, it’s time to use them to make one real decision, as values become more real when they cost something. When you use a value to say no, choose a path, end or begin something, it becomes part of your identity. Better yet, teach them to someone else by explaining how our values force clarity, and also make them part of our narrative. 

At the end of the day, values are not remembered, they are practiced. We don’t “remember” our values the way we remember a phone number or an address, we live them until they become instinct and if we practice our values long enough, they become a reflex, they shape our intuition, guide our decisions without any conscious effort and this becomes part of our character. 

That’s the real goal. Finally, if you still are looking for one or two values in your list of five, ask yourself the following question: “What are the principles I refuse to compromise, even when no one is watching?” This should reveal them. Good luck!