Let's sell California to the Chinese!

It's been done before; the French sold us Louisiana and the Russians Alaska. In view of the recent budget woes, my wife suggested this morning that we ought to sell California to the Chinese. They have the money to pay for it and they might reconcile its divided state house so it finally gets in order, something Arnold was unable to accomplish. I thought it was the best idea I had heard in a very long time. With the proceeds, we might make a significant dent into our federal budget deficit or perhaps pay for a decent health care system for the 49 remaining states; I know, the conservative might prefer funding a low-budget, quick-war against Iran, but we should be able to reach a consensus on how to best spend that heap of money...

Once the Golden State sale is closed, we'd be able to travel "abroad" quite cheaply, with little jet lag, and most of us would have a strong incentive to learn Chinese instead of spending too much time shopping, because we'd all know that it might just be a matter of time before our own state is also sold to China. Californians would quit boasting that they are the sixth economic power on earth, Californian universities will continue to accept a minority of non-Asian students, the state capital would be moved to San Francisco's Chinatown, Hollywood would finally be at peace with itself, promoting its productions as market-communism inspired and Silicon Valley could produce everything it can think of, quite cheaply, right in its own backyard.

I've saved the best for last, though. This sale would go a long way into solving our immigration problem. Illegal migrations flows would now be reversed and go from North to South, with Tijuana erecting a fence of its own, and if the experiment gets legs, we could subsequently sell Arizona, New Mexico and Texas to the Chinese so they can be in full control of the issue and, with the proceeds, give one free iPhone to each remaining US Citizen. Don't laugh, a Chinese California might be the solution we've all been waiting for strengthening America!