My advice to Kamala Harris

Recently, Donald Trump (DT) began attacking Kamala Harris (KH), the new presumptive Democratic nominee, by using words like “dumb as a rock”, “bum”, “laughing stock” or “phony” among other expletives, and that left me wondering as to what the best response would be to these demeaning qualifiers.

Initially, I was of the opinion that the best answer to these gratuitous insults should be reciprocated in kind, but after thinking about it, there’s a better way to address Trump’s foul mouth and this is how it could unfold, should Trump ever muster the courage to debate with Harris as it has been abundantly talked about. 

KH: There's something that has always mystified me, Donald, do you want to know what it is? 

DT: Go ahead ka-mah-la, fire up! 

KH: Your Mom, I heard, was a very classy lady. I’m sure she told you that, in order to really succeed in life you ought to be polite at all times and she set a wonderful example for you. Why is it then that you feel compelled to use derogatory language when you talk about your political opponents? 

DT: What are you talking about ka-mah-la? 

KH: Well, when you have these rallies with thousands of people attending, you constantly say “Crooked Biden” or “Kamala Harris is dumb as a rock”, “a bum” or even a “phony”. We Democrats refrain from using this kind of language that we feel belongs to the gutter. Is you memory going so bad that you’ve forgotten your Mom’s admonitions about using decent and respectful language? I’d like to know? 

DT: When leftists like you are going to take the country over and disenfranchise hard-working Americans, you leave me with no other choice! 

KH: Have you ever considered that you might have a vocabulary deficit? You still could get tutored for that, it’s not complicated and pretty affordable for a billionaire like you! 

DT: You see how nasty you’re getting ka-mah-la! KH: Well I shouldn’t be given all that free advice to an opponent, but you’ve done so much damage to your image by using disrespectful language that you’d need at least another full electoral campaign to get a smidgen closer to me… 

DT: This reek of communist propaganda, ka-mah-la! You should be called out for election interference! 

KH: Let’s continue debating the real issues, Donald, but before we change subject, I’m sure your Mom also told you that you’d catch more flies with honey than with vinegar!